Tuesday, June 01, 2004


I unequivocally want to write yesterday night.
I felt like crying... here comes languor again.
Why do i feel this way. always need to write for the same
old reasons of being unhappy.. being sad, poignant. I'm
so tired of being in this state.
its all my fault. hmmmm...
so much for that...

On the lighter side..
im so happy im alone in the room.. hehehe..
my boss is in the construction site now (but he'll be back tomorrow)
and i can write whatevah i want to.
At least i can do what pleases me to do first in all
my tasks for the day.
I need to finish my estimate for our new
model unit- jasmin- model 80.
I also have to update some construction ledger.

I feel so old.

I dunno what's in my dorm.. but it has this ambiance, sensation
(whatever u want to call it) that makes me sad.
Or maybe becoz.. whenever i arrive, i don't have anybody to
talk to and i don't have any entertainment for
myself in the room. I don't have a tv, but i can listen to
my discman over and over of the same cds most of the time..
i just read.
I'm reading Two Towers of the Lord of the Rings now.
I'm left with nothing to do, except to read and to read.
Its so boooooooring.
But i don't have friends near me to play badminton
on midweek.
In the office most of them wants to go home as soon as
the clock hits 6:30. hmmm... and what more can i say..
they're not that out-going!

I really miss my friends in cemex.. when i was there.. i didn't felt this way.
or maybe i need to catch up with them? set a dinner. or a lunch maybe?

this is my leeway.. to express what's inside me.
after work.. what comes next?

i think i need a new pied-à-terre, a new place to live..

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